Welcome to Day One: I'm Craving Him....Come with Me.

Over coffee a couple weeks ago, I told my best friend that I wanted to make a few physical changes. What she shared next, almost “matter of fact-ly” set so many great things in motion.

Lynnette told me that her mom and dad were reading and following a new bible study called “Made to Crave… Satisfying your deepest desire with God not Food.” When she told me that it was written by Lysa TerKeurst and had a participant guide, a book, AND a DVD… I knew I had to learn more. I checked out her website at www.lysaterkeurst.com and downloaded a free chapter… I was sold. So much so that I had to call mom and tell her all about it. The next thing I knew, within a few days, mom called me to say “You have a package coming.” She ordered the Made to Crave set for me and she and my sister were going to do the study too. How cool is that?

This study is more than the latest weight loss gimmick and doesn’t have a food plan to go with it; you get to pick the one you think will work best for you. It is a “How to Guide” for being the person God intended us to be.

I am blessed even to have a friend do this with me. I met Kathy just a few weeks ago in our Small Group, I jokingly told her in the driveway as we left that first night…. “Just you watch, we are going to be best friends. I just know it.” Who knew that a bible study like this would bridge that gap and make it a reality? We are going to be accountable to each other and use this book as more than just a study to get to the best “us” we can be for Him, but to be the best “us” we can be for each other.

So, yes…today is a Wednesday and it was Day One. Not a typical day to make a life change but nothing He has done through me in the last 16 months has been typical… why start now?

I slept in today, easing into my new life in Him. I took the dog out and High Fived my Cardboard Jesus when we came back in the house. (I could have sworn I saw him wink at me as if to say “We got this kid…. Make it happen.”). Donned the sweats and sweatshirt, made my list of things to do, and out the door I went. When I made it to the gym, I realized that my pink and grey NIKEs were on the ottoman in my library and NOT on my feet. No…I did not walk out into the snow with just my socks on; Curves frowns upon slushy feet in sneakers walking in and getting right onto the machines, so you need to wear snow boots and change into your work out shoes… kinda hard to do when they are placed neatly on an ottoman in a room two miles away. Oops. I giggled to myself and asked (out loud) “What would Jesus do?”  =)  So, I went across the street to the salon and treated myself to a manicure and pedicure. Can’t argue with Cardboard Jesus, right? The next two hours were spent pampering and reading, highlighting, and taking notes in the margins of my “Made to Crave” book.

I slinked out of my black furry snow boots, scrunched up the sweats to the knees, nestled into my massage chair, and dipped my feet into steamy hot, bubbling water. It wasn’t enough to just relax with my book….I had to boast of my decadent treat to Lynnette. When I asked Jesus what he would do in this scenario….calling her to brag was not the response, but I couldn’t resist sharing my surroundings to my best friend when she had several little ones under the age of six running circles around her.

After sitting just ten minutes, two girlfriends walked in together for pedicures of their own. Note to self: Bring Lynnette next time….leave the kids at home. When lotions and potions….massaging and rubbing began I couldn’t help but imagine the perfect analogy; if “Grace” had a physical feeling….it would be a pedicure. I didn’t earn this afternoon to myself and I couldn’t think of anything I did to deserve it; just like “Grace”. I giggled to myself as I remembered my Revelation bible study; Jesus’ angel appearing to John and speaking in symbols. Yes, if “Grace” could be described as a feeling or symbol…. It could easily be a pedicure; a symbol that any woman could completely relate to.

Feeling freshly painted and relaxed, I went home to get my sneakers and then backtracked to the gym. I signed up for a yearlong membership and committed to coming every day; working the circuit at Curves as the music played and women filed in one at a time. I was skeptical and honestly didn’t think that the hydraulic machines could really do much since there were no weights hanging from bars and you shifted stations every thirty seconds but the workout was invigorating and challenging and I am excited to become a regular there and take advantage of all that they have to offer.

Next stop was to the coffeeshop to order a smaller, skinnier version of my favorite “foo foo” coffee. Much like the gym, I thought, “How good can it be if all the good stuff is out of it?” I got the smallest cup they offered, skim milk, and no whipped cream. I have to admit I didn’t mind the milk change but when she asked if I wanted the topping, I hesitated. She smiled as she noticed my inner struggle. I said “I would love the topping but know that it would be too much like eating a Twinkie and drinking a Diet Coke. You better leave it off.” I was shocked at just how yummy the tasty chocolate coffee was and felt tricked into liking it like telling our kids that something good for you….really can be good. I took my very small cup and headed to the grocery store to buy healthier choices to fill my pantry and fridge.

The market started off peachy since you walk into the produce section and many items there are good for you. But when I had to pass the bakery to get to the meat department, the craving for coconut cake was almost too much to handle. I admit that I slowed down but didn’t stop, not wanting to see something too irresistible on the first day. I was a good girl….getting my yogurt, water, cucumber, salad, a few diet meals, and some “must haves” for my new doggie. Paulie isn’t watching his weight but he does need something to nibble on as I have my meals. It was only when I reached the checkout and began unloading my cart onto the conveyor belt that I immediately felt like an old single lady with only her dog to keep her company. My items clearly said lots about me that I quickly had to make excuses for. It was only then that I noticed I never put my wedding ring on today either….remembering it was still on my bedside table, landing there just before bed, alone….last night. The cashier told me that I didn’t have to take the water out next time since it was so heavy and I had to say “Oh…. Thank you. My husband is out of town for a while and he usually lifts that for me.” Huh??? Lol…. I am sure that she didn’t care one way or the other but I had to make sure she knew I wasn’t the chunky older lady with just a dog waiting for her at home at night. I smiled to myself as I headed out the door. It was just one of those days. One of those productive, life changing, really making something happen kinda days.

Lysa’s program includes more than the book, the participant’s guide, and the DVD. It also includes a 21 Day Challenge. Today is Day One. The title of today’s devotion “Chocolate is my Comfort and my Deliverer.” Oops… I had a chocolate coffee. <gulp>

Loved her reference to size…. “You are beautiful and loved, no matter if you’re a size zero or a size thirty. You are beautiful just the way you are. But God loves you so much that He doesn’t want you to stay in a place of defeat.”  I know it….whew. I have never been a zero or a thirty but have been a fourteen/sixteen for more years than I can care to remember. I love how Lysa gives her “number” in open honesty in the first chapter of the book. But then I love anyone that is transparent for others to follow and so I, too, am “outing” myself. Before heading out today, I stepped on the scale (out of range of the mirror of course) and the numbers tipped at 215. Huh? I was so proud of myself for losing weight, once being as much as 265, that I guess 215 looked pretty good for a while….for a while. Oh well…. Have to start somewhere and it truly is just a number (one I hope goes down though). Part of joining Curves included an assessment with medical questions, another visit to the scale, and a measuring tape taking a series of measurements all over.....all over. I had just gotten used to the 215 number when their digital version blinked 223.  I whispered to Jesus “Guess we have our work cut out for us. You ready for this?”

Today’s devotion goes on to finish with…. “The process of getting healthy has to be about more than just losing weight and focusing on ourselves. It’s about recalibrating our souls so that we want to change for the right reasons.” I have not done this for the right reasons before; always living superficially and wanting to please others more than myself…and there were many. But this time I have amazing resources available to me; friends, this bible study, membership to Curves and Weight Watchers online, a supportive husband, and doing it for the RIGHT reasons. When asked to give two goals as part of my assessment, I immediately responded…. “I want to be as physically fit as I am spiritually fit.” (Where did that come from? I surprised myself and tried not to look too shocked at what just came out of my mouth.) My next goal… “I want my outside to match my inside. I have this awesome love for God and feel energized inside and I want it to be apparent on the outside too.” (WOW…. Really? No doubt that this is a "God thing" because it surely wasn't something I could have come up with on my own.)  She agreed that they were two really good goals and before I could think about what I was saying, I replied…. “I know, right?” We both laughed. When I walked out of the gym and breathed in the chilly Michigan air, I knew this time was different. My goals weren’t the superficial “I want to zip up my jeans without laying down on the bed” or “I want to wear a belt and tuck in my shirt”… (Those were real goals I gave years ago when asked…. Although those would be nice perks to the program.)

Psalm 139 said it…. “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” I look forward to learning more about craving Him and not food and being fearfully and wonderfully successful in this part of my journey.